The toilet seat arrived today. It took two weeks, two different companies and a mis-delivery to a city halfway across the state, but it came. Now, the fun of putting the damned thing on to satisfy the State of Maryland, which requires that toilet seats in a food establishments be “open.” The closed circle currently on the commode in the shop won’t do. Both the floor and the sink in the backroom were objectionable, as was the positioning of the soap and paper towel dispenser. Nothing, it seems, is as obsessive compulsive as health department regulations – which, perhaps, is as it should be.
Then, there’s the fire department. Three minutes in and out for three figures out of my bank account. Now, if I were cooking on the premises, it would certainly have been more extensive; there would have been more to check. Still, the brevity coupled with the expense left me with a touch of whiplash.
Then, there was the misunderstanding with the carpenter. I know I said four feet for the shelf. I have no idea what he heard, but I was handed something that I could sit on a desk, not on the floor.
Then, there was the lost credit card machine that sat in a Fed Ex warehouse fifteen miles away from my house without any notification that someone tried to deliver it. The door tag must have blown away in the wind, one might think. But no; the recent college graduate who opened my merchant account sent it to the wrong address. With the most major delivery of all still to come (the long refrigerator with the worktop), I’ll be holding my breath all day tomorrow waiting for the truck to actually pull up to the storefront door – on the actual day it’s scheduled to, for a change.
It’s been a comedy of errors already and the doors haven’t opened yet. The good news: very few of those errors have been mine… and I’ve been able to laugh through most of them.
God willing, the opening is less than two weeks away. Stay tuned!